It's been a long long time but I do feel I want somewhere to vent out or self-motivate.
To sum it up. I had a wonderful romantic crush/fling during my solo-travel in Spain. It could work out because of the long distance and the guy did not want to give it a further try. I felt quite deep in sorrow despite the very short time I spent with the guy. I tried my best to survive this impossible connection until I feel I cannot do it anymore.
He is not enough for me. The message is clear. It's a NO from him and from me. Here I am firm about this "NO" and I know I am strong and beautiful. If he does not like me (enough), it's his loss. I deserve so much better!
Yet, there is a little push that I am so determined to dream for a goal and fight hard for it. It's a more exciting sensation which I really cherish and feel grateful at the moment now.
Many butterflies in my stomach.
I can do it!